middleofnowhere

Palpatine: Excellent. Deploy the troops to the surface of the Endor moon.

Vader: Certainly, Master.(Pause). Um, it’s just..

Palpatine: Yes, Lord Vader?

Vader: Nothing. It’s nothing…(sighs)

Palpatine: Vader?

Vader: Huh? I mean…yes, my Master?

Palpatine: Do not lie to me, my apprentice.

Vader: Ok, here goes. Well, you know the specifications for the armour?

Palpatine: Of course. I designed it myself.

Vader: Right, right. I know, I remember. It’s just…

Palpatine: Yes?

Vader: Well, first. They look great. Just great. They’re lighter, a little more flexible. The boys really like it. They um….they just had one question.

Palpatine: Well, what is it Vader? I have not foreseen such problems.

Vader: Right. Well, they asked me what the armour was good for, right?

Palpatine: Yes….continue.

Vader: So I list the things off. Blasters, lasers, knives, swords, all sorts of crap, right? Even light sabers for the Force’s sake.

Palpatine: Of course. Our enemies have many weapons, Vader.

Vader: They do. They do. But um…they had some concerns about the warning labels…

Palpatine: You mean the one warning about rocks thrown or dropped by creatures under three feet tall?

Vader: Yeah. That one. As well as the warning about being hit by sticks wielded by creatures under three feet tall.

Palpatine: That one too?

Vader: It’s just…well. You know Endor is infested with Ewoks, right?

Palpatine: Yes. Harmless little creatures, not more than two, two and a half feet tall. No developed weaponry - unless of course you count rocks or sticks! HAHAHAHAHA…..oh.

Vader: Yeah.

Palpatine: This is…bad, isn’t it?

Vader: Uhhh. Do you think it’s bad?

Palpatine: Oh shut up. Just once grow a set and stand up to me. Yeesh.

Vader mutters and mumbles as he leaves the chambers