Jan 07 2009
10 Other Sure Things In Life
The old saying goes that there are two sure things in life, death and taxes. We all chuckle at this but it is really true? After all there are lots of places where taxes don’t exist, as well as many people who just don’t pay as many as they’re supposed to. I strongly believe that there are many certainties in life - politics, entertainment, sports and everyday events included.
10 - As long as there are politicians, there will be crooked politicians.
I’m incredulous as to how these stories are even news anymore. Is it really shocking that yet another politician was up to something he wasn’t supposed to? Neither Democrats nor Republicans can take the moral high ground here either - both have had their share of crooks. Canada, the U.K and pretty much every other country is no different with all having scandals in distant and recent history. It all goes back to when Throg got the biggest cave when Gromuk was found mysteriously clubbed to death back in 3100 B.C. No charges were ever laid, but the other cavemen all knew who did it
9 - Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter Both Saying Something Incredibly Offensive
In fairness to both of these individuals, I am sure that with how much they have to say and how much of their time they spend talking they MUST have some (semi) rational points to make. Sadly, they are more focused on shock tactics and pulling the spotlight towards themselves in pretty much any way they can. This is so much of a certainty, I’m pretty sure they’ve both already fulfilled this in 2009. If not….it won’t be long. Trust me. Also, imagine if they had kids? Eek.
8 - The Media Will Giving More Attention to Negative News Than Positive News
Prove me wrong, media. Prove me wrong. Please. I remember living in Labrador years ago and thinking “Wow, there’s so many good things happening here. Why didn’t I know about it?” Because the stories of suicide, alcohol abuse and gas-sniffing got all of the attention. Did the media create this situation? Or did consumers? Either way, the true answer is a scary one.
7 - People with more money than they know what to do with not having any idea what to do with their money.
I know it’s utopian to think that the super wealthy would take even a small percentage of their billions of dollars and really make a difference in the world. I’m also sure that many wealthy people do more than we know or realize. But when I read something like “Lindsay Lohan is so broke, she’s put herself on a strict $1000 a day spending diet”, it kind of makes me sick. I can’t even bring myself to spend 70 dollars on jeans because it seems like such a waste.
6 - Professional sports owners continuing to be idiots.
Know why player salaries are so high? Owners. Know why we can’t afford to see our favourite teams? Owners. Know who says that they’re losing money hand over fist and yet for the most part are in no hurry to sell the franchise? Owners. If someone is going to pay me millions and millions of dollars to play for their team, why would I say no? Who is forcing these owners to pay these ridiculous salaries? Owners. Ugh.
5 - Reality television continuing to get sleazier and stranger.
I’ll admit to enjoying some reality television - Survivor, The Amazing Race and anything with Gordon Ramsay for starters. But there have been some pretty reprehensible shows out there and the bar keeps getting lowered. The other day, I saw a reality show about a guy who’s a big fan of reality shows (Murtz Jaffer, in case you were curious). I’ve just submitted my proposal for my reality show about being a fan of the reality show about the guy who’s a fan of reality shows.
4 - Sharing The Smell or Look of Food That’s Gone Bad
I’ve tried to resist this force, but it’s impossible. Try it. You can’t do it. The first thing we all do upon discovering moldy food, bad juice or sour milk? “Hey, look at this!” And the worst part? The other person’s response? “Sure? *sniff* Oh God! That’s horrible! Hey, come check this out!”, etc. It’s a vicious cycle.
3 - Gravity
For now.
2 - No matter how much evidence there is to support something, some people just won’t believe it.
The earth is flat. Global warming is a myth/conspiracy. Smoking does not cause cancer. Republican/Conservative governments are better at managing finances. No amount of evidence to the contrary will change how some people think.
1 - People Will Still Be at War and it Won’t Solve a Damn Thing
